Marty - 1955

Grade = B+

-This is a movie about a fat old ugly lonely butcher who is one really nice guy.  His brothers and sisters have all gotten married but Poor old Marty is alone and hates life.  I highly recommend this movie for creeps or lonely people who feel they have it bad and will never find love.  Another reason I loved this movie other then it being amazing was that it was 90 minutes long.  90 minutes is perfect. every movie should be 90 minutes long.

-Mr. Joe says: "Be grateful you don't look like Ernest Borgnine"

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides - 2011

Grade = C+

- I really don't know much about these pirate movies, and I don't really like pirates all that much, but for some reason I had a good feeling about this one.  I'm so glad they got rid of that less hot version of Natalie Portman and that other guy, whatever his name is.  Which meant more sexy Johnny Depp and Penelope Cruz. ( I can't really write right now, people are hovering around me)  Anyways, it was an Ok movie, except for that Religious beefcake-ass hole, and what the hell was up with the mermaide, she grew legs? then she was gonna die, made no sense.

-Mr. Joe Says: " Blow on water"

Cars 2 - 2011

Grade = C-

-Pixar's first piece of shit.

-Mr. Joe Says: "laugh at 1 mile per hour for two hours"

Bonnie and Clyde - 1967

Grade = C

- I wanted to like this movie, does that count for anything? No.  All I heard were good things about this film, and I am scared to grade this movie lower than a C because I don't want to look like an idiot.  But the real honest truth is that this movie isn't that great and I was bored as hell at some points.  And it wasn't that Clyde doesn't do Bonnie at all in the movie, or he does once and you don't even see anything, and it wasn't that annoying old lady, I think I didn't like it because it had no punch or tang.  I hope you know what I mean, because I don't.

-Mr. Joe Says: " Maybe I am too stupid to enjoy this one.  Or maybe you are an idiot for liking this one.  OR maybe you are a real moron for even reading this"

The Green Hornet - 2011

 Grade = B-

-Now I have said some really mean things about Seth Rogen, and I really thought I hated him.  But you know what? I have changed my mind about him, and he isn't so bad.  I was expecting Green Hornet to suck so bad and maybe that is why I was surprised at how funny and cool it was.  It is not amazing, but it is better than going outside.  It was good enough for me to say that Seth Rogen is ok with me ( Until I see that dumbass movie pineapple express again, man that sucks balls).  The Asian guy was pretty good to, and an old nasty yet cute Cameron Diaz is in it.

Mr. Joe Says: " I liked it, it would have been better if it was rated R and had more blood and violence, or maybe it wouldn't have been I don't know" 

Paul - 2011

Grade = C

-I really thought this movie was going to be special, or at least really really cool.  I liked the beginning but then I slowly just wanted it to be over.  Another reason why I might have just thought this movie was whatever was that sitting directly behind me was laughing his ass off right into my ear.  Until I got up and moved seats all I could think of was, where does this guy live and with what will I kill him with.  And after I moved seats, another guy starts up laughing his mexican lips off... I couldn't believe it, a whole theater full of Assholes, but I should have known because this movie was directed by the guy who made superbad...  I don't think I ever want to go to the theater again.

-Mr. Joe says: "forgettable, but I really liked all the Star Wars references"

Jackie Brown - 1997

Grade = B+

- I haven't been doing these reviews so much anymore but don't worry I've been packing in the movies, or in this case "Fudge packing" in the movies... I'll go ahead and say that Jackie Brown is great... I don't know what to say in these reviews anymore.  I've lost the passion.  I am just repeating myself...  Just watch this movie if you have nothing to do.

-Mr. Joe Says: "Jackie Brown, fun for the whole family."